Thursday, February 16, 2012

IVF #1=Not Good

What a weird situation. They think we're having an ectopic pregnancy, even though that only happens for 1% of IVF cases.

We finally had our u/s on Tues and they couldn't find anything even though our HCG kept going up. Our doctor was genuinely surprised and disappointed, but I also don't think he was fully aware of how much I had been bleeding the last couple of weeks.

I have to get a methotrexate shot tomorrow. This will be my 3rd. We've had a total of 5 miscarriages at the pre-week 6 mark. I'm afraid to even tell my parents about this one. What I really don't want to hear from people is that maybe my body isn't meant to be pregnant. That's what all of this would indicate, right?

Except with each step we feel like we get closer to unraveling this mystery. I'd say that if everything worked with this IVF cycle except that it somehow traveled up to my tubes, then it's bound to be right next time, right?? Or in the next couple of times?

They said we'd be at transfer stage again 6-10 weeks from now depending on when my period comes, etc. (Can't imagine a period again after 3 weeks of bleeding!!!).

Anyway, since I have a little window of 'freedom', I'm trying to get down to FL in the winter to visit my cousin. I think that'll do me some good. Let's see if I can get decent airfare now!

Thanks for all your support. Overall, I'm doing very well emotionally. There's so little we have control over and I really just want to be at peace. That, and I had a little chat with my mom after last weekend's disappointment with her, and it went really well - I feel the love!


  1. Weird. How does it get in the tubes?

    So very sorry. Don't listen to those people who say that you aren't meant to be preggars. That;s a bunch of crap.

    I can't recall--do you have frosties?

  2. 1%? Really? Well, I had the same thing. Methotrexate sucks. Made me sick. Yuck. It may not actually be ectopic, just that there's some tissue in your ute and it's still producing HcG. At least that was the case when it happened to me. I had to have methotrexate shots twice that cycle.

    Do take it easy and be especially good to yourself.

  3. I am so sorry! That just sucks. I agree with Jem...take it easy and be good to yourself.

  4. I'm so sorry. I couldn't remember if you were going through Sh.ady Grove or not, but I love the RE we saw there. I took Lov.enox with my last IVF cycle to help with implantation. It was almost a last ditch effort by my dr (and it worked)and I'm glad he decided to go with that protocol (since I had a history of miscarriage too).

    It's like you said, there's so little that we have control over. And I know it's hard, but hang in there. I pray that you will be able to find the peace that you are seeking. :)

  5. I have heard it's higher actually, than 1% in IVF cases. (I want to say closer to 8-10%.) It's not as rare as people think. In any case, it sucks. I've been through it. I also have a history of early miscarriage as well- 3 in addition to the ectopic. (pre 6 weeks.) They've had 2 working theories with me- they were all ectopics that resolved themselves. Or, it's endometriosis/ enviornmental issue. I'm sorry that you are going through this right now, it hurts. The limbo of it all is difficult. I am also sorry to hear that you have needed 3 methlytrexate shots- I was told I actually needed to wait 3 months after the shot as it affected egg quality? Did they ever actually find it on u/s? The above poster was correct, they can sample your endometrial lining as it can be fetal tissue in there... Plus, it took awhile for hcg to come down...Best wishes to you as you continue on this journey. The ectopic added so much insult to injury for me...This is tough stuff. Hugs to you.