I've been a bit quiet lately. I can't tell if it's because I'm not actively going through anything 'trying' related right now. Or if I'm busy at work or busy with holiday stuff. Or maybe I'm still feeling quite peaceful and don't have the need to pour out my feelings as much.
I just read a blog entry by Dr Lisa Rouff, Infertility Therapist on Resilience is the Real Fertility. It really struck me particularly since Eliz.abeth Ed.wards' passing was significant to me this week and I felt she taught us a lot about resilience. And maybe because most of what I've craved this entire time is peace. I know my children will take awhile to get to me, however they do, so all I want in the meantime is peace. A way to better handle the challenge.
I also want to share a chapter of a book that I think is a must-read for anyone facing the 'what's next' in adoption, donor sperm/egg/embryo, surrogacy, childlessness, etc. I would NEVER have picked up this book a year ago and I wish I had. The book is called Adopt.ing Af.ter In.fertility by Pat.ricia Ir.win John.ston.
My counselor recommended it to me when I was telling her that my husband and I are stuck on not necessarily agreeing on adoption vs. continuing treatments. The book was written in the early 90s and there has been no update since but it's still extremely relevant.
The first chapter is called The Challenge of Infertility and focuses on ranking 6 areas that matter most to you and your partner so that you can begin (often difficult) conversations about what you are both willing to explore, or something along those lines.
I'd list the six areas but am afraid I'd be plagiarising... suffice it to say that it's well worth getting on ama.zon or some other place!
It made me realize that I may want to give conceiving more effort before we consider adoption. There's a lot that goes into this but that's what the chapter tells you to do - talk about putting a plan together.
My short-term plan: we leave for Turks & Caicos in 2 weeks!!! :)
1 month ago