Thursday, November 18, 2010

Not in a Great Place

This week has been a bit of agony for me. I am not used to not getting the level of care I had been getting with our RE and in retrospect, I should have just called them first rather than my obgyn. They don't call me until 5pm with results!!! Who does that???

So, I tested Friday & then spotted all weekend. Called Monday to say I think I needed to be retested. They said wait for the results. Ok - 5pm they say tell me 61 & to re-test Tuesday. Got those results at 5pm last night - 107. (I'm more used to a 5 hour turnaround, not 28 hour turnaround!!).

Anyway, it should have been around 240. So, less than half of what it's supposed to be. The irony is that I stopped spotting yesterday.

They're having me repeat bloodwork today - though I guess I won't get the results till 5pm Friday - ARGH!!!!! I'm also doing a sonogram today at 1pm. I'm worried it's either miscarrying or ectopic. Maybe it's just a really slow grower...

Think peaceful thoughts for me today, please.

I also had a hard time seeing the gift that my sister-in-law's gave to her sister in law on facebook - new onesies.

The thing I want most of all is just to be ME again. To be happy & chipper and not bitter. I don't know who this person is who has overtaken my body.

On a happy note, being in HR, I got my office to play App.les to App.les yesterday (and we even had apples & peanut butter as a snack!) & people LOVED it. (If you haven't played it, it's the MOST fun game ever - and a great family game if you're anxious of too much sitting around with your family over Thanksgiving!). I was very pleased that our office enjoyed it since that is my favorite game & because most of them hadn't heard of it before! And it let me forget about my problems for a little while...


  1. What an emotional rollercoaster. And, yes, your RE freaking SUCKS. I would be on the phone every hour...asking if they had my results yet...playing the woebegone infertile whose life is hung upone the results (OK, that's reality...but sometimes I don't think dr's office remember this and so I play it up that I am a hysterical, crying, infertile...OK, I am). :>

    My heart is hoping for the best or that you at least get an answer soon.

  2. i still holding out hope for you here!

  3. sorry for your emotional rollercoaster...I am sending you lots of hope and prayers...*hugs*

  4. Hoping and praying for you. Keeping you all in my thoughts...

  5. (((Huge hugs))) My thoughts are with you...

  6. I'm sorry about all the waiting and results that aren't what you hoped for. They are still rising, and that's good. Getting pregnant is a huge accomplishment for you, so I'm hoping, hoping that staying pregnant isn't much of a hurdle this time!